Shoe Boss

I worked for a small, independently owned shoe store during my
teenage years in Washington state. It was my first job, and as my big
sister had put in a good word for me I felt absolutely ecstatic about
it. I loved my two co-workers, the work wasn’t hard, and I enjoyed
the shoe talk with the ladies that came in. I got to help women out
with weddings, hiking, heard all sorts of fun stories and displayed
some lovely shoes.

The only problem was the boss, who was a nightmare. She never smiled,
looked perpetually pissed off, and I don’t think she knew the meaning
of a gentle voice. She constantly changed her mind, wanting us to
rearrange the store every week so customers never knew where things
were. She also loved to call meetings on the spot and drag our poor
manager to California to help her see new product lines (despite the
fact this woman was a single mother with two young children), plan
meetings and call us that morning so we could come in early. She even
dragged in her huge cockatiel into work that hated any other human
being besides herself.

The last straw for me came when I got the opportunity to go away on
vacation with my fiance to Oregon during Valentine’s Day. I was going
to take a train down to meet him there, and we would spend a weekend
together. I notified my boss three weeks beforehand, and she gave me
the time off.

I got a call ON THE TRAIN asking me to come in for a staff meeting. I
stammered out that I was half-way to Vancouver and there was no way I
could turn the train around and ride all the way back to Bainbridge
Island (roughly 3 hours away). She would not accept a conference call
(which would have worked out better for all of us, seeing how only one
person was working the day I was leaving on vacation). I informed her
that if she wasn’t going to let me have a conference call, instant
message or webcam I didn’t know what I could do.

She ordered me to take a train back the minute I got into Portland
(which meant that I would get back to Seattle late at night, when the
meeting was quite obviously over).

Needless to say, I quit on the spot.

A Perfect Balance

The company I work for tries to be progressive and overall they do a
good job. One of the things they constantly talk about is having the
proper “Work/Life Balance”. I’m cool with that, but my boss isn’t.

Beside berating anyone who is on a reduced work schedule, he recently
said, “Yes, we all should have a good work/life balance… 12 hours at
work and 12 hours at home.”

He seriously meant it.

Alone Time

Quite a few years ago I worked for a company with a male boss who
hired women for their boobs and not their brains. My now best friend
came in looking for a job. She didn’t meet the qualifications and she
did not even make it into the 2nd interview (flat out no called, no
showed) but somehow she was hired. We overheard the boss telling
another employee how this new girl he hired was stacked and that he
wanted all the girls in his office to have those kind of ‘assets’.

One day after closing, he put on a pornographic movie in the break
room with the male employee ‘just for laughs’ as he said. He told my
friend and I that we should hang out but we were disgusted and left.

The following day we were closed and I was walking to my car. My boss
ran up to me and asked me if I wanted to go have drinks with him and a
friend at Red Robin across the street. I declined. He kept asking, and
then told me that he had fantasized about my friend and I while
having some ‘alone time’ if you know what I mean. I was totally
creeped out.

I was 19 at the time and young and scared of losing my first job, but
the next day I immediatley went to my HR department. They did an
investigation and 3 days later he packed up his breifcase and left
without a word.

The Pilot

I once had what I thought was my dream job, working for a small local
office of an international non-profit. I probably should have guessed
something was wrong when they called *me*, rather than the other way
around, because the former secretary had walked out in the middle of
one of the two busiest times of the year. Oh, my. However, the hours
were perfect, the commute was short, and the pay was very nice,
indeed. Boss lady was very witty, and a lot of fun to work with.

I knew she was a nit-picker, but she was responsible for everything
that went out over her signature, and that was what I was getting
paid for. Her mom was in a nursing home, and I overlooked a lot of
stuff because I figured she was under a lot of stress. She was always
right, no matter what the topic. She even corrected me once when I
said I grew up on a farm!

However – she was the world’s biggest slob (they called her The
Pilot, because she piled it here, and she piled it there.) and when
she ran out of space in her own office, she started stacking things
in other offices, and complaining if her things got moved. Her own
office was such a mess that she had to use my computer, and then
complained that I took too long to get my work done. She also
considered herself an expert on all things artistic, and would
rearrange posters and pictures in other offices. Not much, just an
half an inch in this direction and a quarter inch the other, just
enough that the staple marks showed and you knew she’d been messing
with your stuff. She also took down a professionally done display for
a major sales event and completely redid it to suit her self.

When her own boss was due for a visit, she rented a storage unit,
gathered up everything in sight, and slammed it in there.
Unfortunately, she also took other people’s things, and none of them
ever saw the light of day again!

Boss-lady never came in until 11:00 or so, and one morning I got a
phone call that needed to be forwarded to her immediately. When I
called her house, she ripped into me for five minutes straight
without drawing a breath (OK, so I exagerate) and then asked me what
was so all-fired important that I needed to disturb her at home. “I
just called to tell you that so-and-so (another employee) died last
night.” And then I hung up. I figured it would have killed her to
apologize, and all she’d do was ask me why I hadn’t said so in the
first place. She came in right away, but never apologized to me or
mentioned it in any way.

I’d been there a year and a half when she went away for a week. She
came back with a list of things I had been doing wrong or should have
been doing. Never mentioned any of them before this, but put me “on
notice” for not doing my job properly. I should have quit then, but
it’s like a marriage – you remember the good things and hope the
situation will improve.

When I typed up a report, she’d move a comma and change a word. With
the computer it only takes a few seconds to change things, but when I
got back she’d ignore me and act as if she was deeply involved in
something for about five minutes while I twiddled my thumbs, and then
do some more editing and we’d do the same dance again. She’d fart
around for half an hour and then fuss with me because I took too long
to get my work done.

I finally gave notice, but the girl who was to replace me hadn’t had
a lick of training, so I volunteered to stay a week longer. “That way
I can train Mary and you can go visit your mother”, who was in another
state. Discovered Mary had been hired a week after boss-lady had come
back from vacation, but she didn’t want to pay unemployment, so she
was trying to get me to quit. I had to fight for six months to get my
last pay check because I had “volunteered”.

Oh, Mary stayed six weeks!