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Home Improvements

I work for that big home improvement store. Before I worked there I
was in the military for many years. I had a lot of sexism while
serving (not easy being a female in the military) and I usually
ignored it because mostly it was harmless and because the chain of
command would come down hard on the perpetrator. Now I’m a civilian
and my boss has to be the biggest shitbag I’ve ever come across, he
blatantly makes sexual comments in front of customers and other
employees. He acts like women are stupid and should stay at home.
Needless to say me and this dirtbag butt heads constantly so I just
usually ignore him and his dumbass. One day me and a friend of mine were
talking about weapons and I made the comment I owned an AR-15. My
genius boss comes up “No you don’t. You’re lying.” So being the smartass
I’ve always been of course I said “Yes of course I’m lying. I have
never handled a weapon a day in my life.” So he must of felt like an
ass when a friend of mine, also in the service, told him I’d been on 5
deployments, was qualified 50cal, m-16, m9, shotgun, etc. etc. Luckily
I’m only doing this job until I get done with school, I might come
back to work for these guys so I can be his boss someday, that would
be epic.

35 Comments to Home Improvements

  1. Report him to HR. Period. There are no ands, ifs, or buts that are appropriate for not reporting him to HR.

  2. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  3. T-rex is right, however I like the idea of you being his boss even better so you should do that instead.

  4. Doomy on January 7th, 2013
  5. Have one of your hot female friends come in and pretend to be a customer. If your boss is as big a douchebag as you make him out to be and makes an improper comment or three to her, she can call corporate and file a severely worded complaint. Then repeat with a different hot female friend until the volume of complaints about him gets too much and he’s either fired, demoted or transferred.

    Corporations tend to blow off employee whining about bosses, especially if it comes from females, but if customers complain about someone they take that VERY seriously — that’s potential money walking out the door upset.

  6. Les Moore on January 7th, 2013
  7. I don’t understand why you don’t bring your AR-15 in to work, and use it.

    Isn’t that what people do when they’re upset at life?

  8. SirJP on January 7th, 2013
  9. first off thanks for your service especially seeing you did 5 deployments!!! if i had the chance id would come and kick his stupid ass for you. good luck

  10. Joachim on January 7th, 2013
  11. His dumbass? Does he have a sidekick?

  12. The Oxford Comma on January 7th, 2013
  13. It would be epic for you to be his boss? Why?

  14. stupid on January 7th, 2013
  15. I’m with Joachim. Thanks for your service, OP — 5 deployments is a lot even for a man to deal with, let alone a woman.

  16. Les Moore on January 7th, 2013
  17. I reckon that boss was correct, story teller. Leave the men’s work to the men and you shall find happiness in the bliss of domesticity. I do hope your eggs were not hardboiled by the chemicals you were exposed to as a soldier, story teller, as that would interfere with God’s plans for you to bear children.

  18. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on January 7th, 2013
  19. Corporations actually take sexual harrassment complaints from employees very seriously. Hostile workplace lawsuits cost companies a lot of money, because a jury almost always sympathizes with the individual over the corporation. Take it to HR.

  20. Barbara on January 7th, 2013
  21. MY DEAR FRIENDS AND BROTHERS IN CHRIST: DO NOT READ THE FILTH ENTITLED HOLY BLOOD HOLY GRAIL! IT IS BLASPHEMY HEATHENOUS DEVIL-INSPIRED TRASH!

  22. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on January 7th, 2013
  23. Walter, lay off the acid strips.

  24. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  25. Why did you read it, Walter?

  26. stupid on January 7th, 2013
  27. It was a Christmas gift from Amy, she thought it was about the life of Jesus and based on the Bible.

  28. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on January 7th, 2013
  29. Let me guess, Walt: family members regularly buy you books with “–Bible” in the title, like The Bartender’s Bible, thinking they’re actual Holy Bibles?

    Bless you for your service, OP. Your boss is a dick. I agree with others: report his dumb ass and get him in real hot water. Never mild Walter, he’d tell a woman who just singlehandedly saved the world from nuclear destruction by using nothing but her own smarts when all the men decided we were doomed and stood around waiting, that she was bucking God’s plan for her and shouldn’t have tried to do a man’s job.

  30. Zephyr Skunk on January 7th, 2013
  31. Also: I had to look up the book Walt mentioned, as I’d never heard of it. Apparently it’s sort of “What if the guy who wrote ‘The DaVinci Code’ actually believed it was true?” What a crock of BS. Walt, you’re not wrong in calling it bad.

  32. Zephyr Skunk on January 7th, 2013
  33. I’m at my new job so glad to be employed again! :-) op I would get proof and submit to jr about the boss’s behavior and have the customers report him too.

  34. Kate on January 7th, 2013
  35. Booooooobiiiiieesssss Kate. Show ‘em.

  36. stupid on January 7th, 2013
  37. I read Holy Blood, Holy Grail years ago. Zeph, do you often dismiss anything that you might disagree with as stupid based on a sentence or two you read on the internet? Open your mind a bit. It might be a bit of a stretch in reality, but I thought it was a fascinating read. You don’t have to believe it to find it interesting.

  38. The Oxford Comma on January 7th, 2013
  39. That would be great to come back to work for the company and be his boss. But more importantly, thanks for serving our country!

  40. Jessica Brylan on January 7th, 2013
  41. Indeed, ‘You don’t have to believe it to find it interesting’…that applies to The Bible as well.

  42. SirJP on January 7th, 2013
  43. I’m sure it’s very interesting, though from what I see, it sounds like a lot of pseudoscience based on guesses. Maybe I’ll actually read it. It might be entertaining, but I don’t believe it’s TRUE per se.

    As to the actual Bible, I see some of the more fantastic parts as being written in stories, parables, idioms, explanations of the way things are couched in terms that people of the time could understand and relate to. (Some of it, I all but disregard entirely. I believe Leviticus was a set of rules written for time-and-society-specific reasons, put down under the assumption that they were “our laws” and “we” were Godly people, thus they must be God’s laws. Very few Christians if any follow most of the laws in Leviticus, but they latch onto one of them as though it alone is important.)

  44. Zephyr Skunk on January 7th, 2013
  45. ZS, for crying out loud! Go back to the bar and ask them if you left your sense of humor on the bar stool!

  46. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  47. Better yet, call the bar and ask them if your friend, “Sensav Umer” is there.

  48. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  49. Ehh, I’ve got a sense of humor. It’s just pretty dry.

  50. Zephyr Skunk on January 7th, 2013
  51. Or your old buddy Jacques Strahp. Or Oliver Klotheshopf.

    Or Amanda Hugginkis.

  52. patricko on January 7th, 2013
  53. How do you know the names of the friends of Zephyr Skunk? I do not see any of those individuals amongst his friends on The Facebook.

    Anyone who finds that book “interesting” should be baptised by fire.

  54. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on January 7th, 2013
  55. You do not have a dry sense of humor. You’re just a serious person who pretends to have a dry sense of humor.

  56. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  57. Oh, you should also ask for Al Brakyonek, or Clint Torres.

  58. t-rex on January 7th, 2013
  59. Mike Hunt, Mike Rotch, Ollie Tabooger….

    Call the bar and ask for these people, Skunk.

    I’ll give you a shiny nickel….

  60. patricko on January 7th, 2013
  61. I had a friend as a child by the name of Bob Bee. I am laughing! That was a funny name!

  62. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on January 7th, 2013
  63. Good for you girl. Don’t put up with the ignorance of people who don’t understand we have women warriors these days.

  64. Carver on January 8th, 2013
  65. Walt should ask around for Betty Humpter. Or Mike Oksmall.

  66. Zephyr Skunk on January 8th, 2013
  67. Don’t forget Arthur Foxache.

  68. Deep Thought on January 8th, 2013
  69. If it’s not working for you, use a Cockney accent. Thus the “th” becomes “f”, and the “o” in Fox…sounds like “u” in “upper”….

  70. Deep Thought on January 8th, 2013

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