I found out today from a male coworker that my boss comes over to my
desk and asks questions he knows the answer to simply so he can stare
down my shirt. Oh, and he is fat, bald and old enough to be my dad.
Use a little glue and paste some hair in your cleavage, then wear a low cut shirt. Do it gradually, though, one hair the first day, then a few more, a few more the next week, etc. until you have more chest hair than he does. It will probably stop once he starts thinking you are growing a divinely hairy chest.
Fat and bald have nothing to do with the story. Looking down your shirt is grounds for a sexual harassment lawsuit – IF you can prove it.
Once had a girl at target wearing a low cut shirt bend over to get the barcode off an item in my cart. I tried not to look but there it was, a foot from my face. So after she stood back up, I said “Sorry, I was trying not to look”… and she laughed.
Have a sense of humor about it, but call him out, and see what happens. “Oh, sorry, are you looking for some money hidden in there?” or some such.
You can’t stop men from staring at your chest, but you can prevent them from looking down your shirt if you stop wearing low cut tops, OP, if you really care that much. I’ve just learned to live with it. I cover up cleavage when I should (like in a professional setting) but when I do show some, I know men, and some women too, will look down my top if they’re given the opportunity.
So, what does the boss being fat, bald and old enough to be your father have to do with you dressing provocatively? Try dressing more appropriately and you won’t have the issue. Showing cleavage is unprofessional and invites the perverts to do such a thing.
You are causing the problem, not the boss. He is a man, and it’s no secret that if you bare ANY cleavage, men WILL look.
I don’t know when it became the norm for women to flash cleavage at work, but it’s tacky. Then to get your knickers in a twist when men look at your wares is just sniveling. You’re the one displaying it. Take some personal responsibility, you twit.
*sigh* I remember when my older sister started a job where my aunt works and, on the first day, she was reprimanded by her boss for wearing something “fit for a strip club in a courthouse” on the first day. My aunt came home in tears she was laughing so hard.
Maybe you should start bartending and get some tips if they’re worth looking at that much. Otherwise, just wear a cami underneath any low-cut tops sweetie.
I hate to say this but if having a man look down your shirt is the worst you have happen to you in your work place, you got it made.
A million years ago (I was 19), I started my government job and an older employee grabbed my breast and made a comment. By the time I walked back from my bosses office to my building, the man had been moved to the other side of the base.
If I had a problem everything a guy made a comment about my tata’s or the way I sway my hips (even after a million years) there would be no one left to work with. LOL
You have to do what the other people say – wear different clothes OR understand that some men will do that. It doesn’t make it right, but it will make you feel better to not have men you don’t feel are attractive stealing glances at your goods.
Stop wearing shirts that show off your boobs and wear camisoles under your tops.
Also who cares about age or looks? I think older men are sexy and as for looks – good looking guys could be abusive jerks while the “fat and bald” might treat you like a goddess. Personality is more important then looks.
I have the same problem when I’m working on the fridge in somebody’s house. Only I’m fat. And it’s not boob cleavage. And they usually only do it once by accident, then they leave me alone to do my work. I feel like such a piece of meat.
I agree with everyone, your problem is that you wear too low cut shirts at work. Clearly, you do it for the attention from younger men. But, your plan backfired. You should go to plan be, wear better clothing. And call people out when they are obvious. Ask if they are looking for a pen, post-it note, something, because obviously, they wouldn’t be standing right over you for any other reason than they were looking for something.
Really? Women wear low cut tops intentionally because they like the attention they get from men. Maybe not this particular man, but in general they like the attention. That’s why women continue to buy them despite their supposed complaints about men staring at their chest. If you don’t like it, then don’t wear low cut tops, problem solved.
i wear low cut tops because i enjoy the attention of any male because my dad never loved me….anyway, its perfectly natural for you to show your boobs in public, next time, just ask this man to show his as well. that way you’ll be even.
I have GG breasts, if I can put them away so that no one is looking down my top, so can you. If you’ve got them on display you have no right to complain that guys are looking. If he were making comments, or touching you, then yes, totally inappropriate, but complaining that he’s looking is like complaining that someone looked at your hair. If it’s on display in a public forum, then people are going to look, and if you are uncomfortable with that, then cover up.
I used to have a teacher (in high school) who used her breasts to intimidate people. She’d lean over our tiny desks and push them out at us while staring us down. It worked. It’s really uncomfortable to have large breasts that close to your face in a classroom setting. Perhaps, you could just own your boobies and use them in your favor, OP.
OK may I say, that my own personal issue is not the peaking down the shirt… even when I’m all covered guys still stare at my chest.. I’m a grown up, I get it… my problem is when they make comments… it’s like, dude, look… but don’t talk to me about them… or lookie but no touchie… ya know? I’m not the OP btw lol.
One thing not mentioned – perhaps the male friend who was refering to the “other guy” looking down your top was lying. Perhaps he was just trying to tell u in a nice way that he thinks u need to cover up.
If you haven’t noticed him doing it yourself then he’s obviously not being obtrusive about it, in which case he’s not creating an uncomfortable environment. Something can’t really be harassment if you don’t notice it happening; stands to reason.
of all the jobs I’ve held, all men who looked were held accountable. Stupid shit right there. A buddy of mine tried it out by wearing a pair of PT shorts that were about 3 sizes too big so his junk was on display… He gets in trouble for 1) looking down a shirt that’s practically touching the desk, the neckline was so large, 2) checkin out cooters from girls whose shorts are too big or too form-fitting, 3) gets charged with indecent exposure. Fuck the Military
*Not saying Fuck the Military in a derogatory form – I’ve served in both Marines and Army and while the 2 have shitty times, the majority of the time spent in either one rocked!*