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That’s My Wife

I suspected that my wife was having an affair but I let that feeling
go on too long before I did something about it.

The 2nd week of December 2007 my company had a Christmas party. It
was just the same as the past 10 Christmas parties I’ve ever gone to
but this one was different. This party my boss decided to press his
business card into the palm of my wife of 12 years. Yes, this is the
same wife that I helped put through college and paid the oil bill for
her mother for like, forever.

So, I’ll cut to the punchline….It turns out that my boss was
banging my wife, mostly in a hotel but I learned later that he was
doing her in my house and once did it on my desk while I was at the
gym.

I got the last laugh though. My lawyer requested the surveillance
footage from my office the night of their tryst and I was able to sue
her for pretty much everything and got my boss fired.

I got 250K in the divorce. My lawyer got half of that but what the
hell. My loser wife is gone, my ex-boss is pushing a shopping cart
around Virginia and I have a great job in Florida.

26 Comments to That’s My Wife

  1. karma! love it.

  2. kristen on May 26th, 2010
  3. Rock on! I know it’s bad for the girl to cheer on the guy, but you ditched the witch.

  4. Aimee on May 26th, 2010
  5. Shit man! Did you at least whoop his ass?! Yes, she sucks for doing that, but he is a huge douche for knowing she was his employee’s (or anyone”s for that matter) wife, and screwing her anyways! I’m glad you took her to the cleaners in the divorce, though. Go buy yourself a new bass boat.

  6. Employee on May 26th, 2010
  7. You left out the part about how you leaped from your boss giving your wife a business card to the two of them having an affair. That’s not a connection most people would make no matter how firmly he pressed her hand.

  8. Jeff on May 26th, 2010
  9. It was the same but it was different? Your lawyer took 50%?

    Just not believeable, at all.

  10. Hawk on May 26th, 2010
  11. Dude, that is easily the worst boss story I’ve read yet! (and I’ve read every single one, ha ha). Sorry you had to go through that, but at least it worked out for you in the end.

  12. dude... on May 26th, 2010
  13. I’m really sorry this had to happen, but you went for the win! I’m proud of ye, my boy.

  14. ReBeL13 on May 26th, 2010
  15. You’re lucky your lawyer was better than hers. I had about the same story – only I was the one who got screwed. It’s ok, though. It’s 25 years later and his 5th wife walked out on him and took the kids, which makes him now have to get a job to be able to live in that faboo bullet trailer behind his dad’s house. Boohoo – no more wife to live off of. Ten years after our divorce I married a CEO and live in a custom house with a pool. We have a set of triplets that are gifted and go to an expensive private school.
    Hawk – yeah the lawyer takes 50% of whatever you get. If you lose, you only end up losing the retainer fee of around $9K. All of your stuff can be replaced. And you are probably better off replacing it if you married a complete gold-digger dick head like I did.

  16. onhonono on May 26th, 2010
  17. You get a nice big round of applause from me. You dumped that bitch and made out like a bandit in court. Too often in America does the guy get raped in the divorce proceedings, but you’re one of the lucky ones who got just about everything. Nice work.

  18. Al on May 26th, 2010
  19. divorce lawyer FTW!!! 50%… tha’ts huuuuuuge

  20. Greg on May 27th, 2010
  21. i believe the lawyer took 50 percent.. i mean come on the coughbitchcough probably didnt go down without a fight. pun intended ;p either way in the end alls well that ends well.. or with a buncha cash.. either way..

  22. wow ok on May 27th, 2010
  23. Just imagine they had not had surveillance in the office… bet it would not have been that good for him then.

    Aren’t laws fun?

  24. Xe on May 27th, 2010
  25. “Paid the oil bill?” What does that mean?

  26. Michelle on May 27th, 2010
  27. Dude, did you beat his ass?

  28. Casey on May 27th, 2010
  29. cool story, bro

  30. richard on May 27th, 2010
  31. Lawyers make out. The only thing unbelievable is that he did well, congrats. I wish I were as lucky. I was in Iraq 16 months while the ex spent $200k and drove me $30k into the hole, all while she carrying on an emotional affair. I got back, and got stuck paying for the house while waiting for it to sell so she can get half… so, congrats to you again… totally jealous.

  32. eternalgreenknight on May 27th, 2010
  33. This story is so lacking in detail it has to be false. BULL SHIT!

  34. i like cheese on May 27th, 2010
  35. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

  36. Phill on May 27th, 2010
  37. If it’s anything like my grandparents they have their own underground Gasoline and Diesel fuel pumps on they’re property for the work trucks. They own a business. Could be along the same lines as that and he just called it oil.

  38. Electronics Sales Associate on May 27th, 2010
  39. The oil bill is most likely home heating oil.

  40. joe on May 29th, 2010
  41. EPIC WIN!!!!

  42. OMG!!! on May 29th, 2010
  43. ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!

  44. c16621 on May 31st, 2010
  45. WOW! Good for fucking you!!! That’s AMAZING!!

  46. C Dub on June 1st, 2010
  47. @ I Like Cheese – How is this story not believeable??! It makes total sense and it means nothing that the guy didn’t want to go into too much detail about the incidents that occured between the business card exchange and him finding out.

    Good on you OP for giving those horrible people what they deserved!!

  48. Lydia on August 26th, 2010
  49. SO FAKE!!! How many hours did your lawyer log into earn 125K? It’s against the law to post a contingency fee on the outcome of a divorce case. You make me sick.

  50. t-rex on January 3rd, 2011
  51. I call BS. The company wouldn’t be obliged to hand over the security tapes for a civil matter like a divorce. A criminal court, sure, but not a divorce.

  52. Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff on February 16th, 2011

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