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The Bogus Bonus

My boss about six months ago said that he would allow me to
participate in the “Bonus Program”. There are two other employees
that are in this program, the shop guy and the sales guy. Now this
program basically works like this, my boss basically pulls these
numbers out of his ass cause they never correlate to the sales number
we did for the month. Once he figures out how much he is going to give
each month, he divides the amount amongst the three of us and deposits
half of this amount in to a checking account that he had set up for
each of us, an account which we have no access to whatsoever and that
the we widely believe we will never see that money anyways. So the
other half he gives us in a separate check less taxes. So he made a
big deal about how I am part of this program. I was less enthusiastic
as I started receiving my bonus checks, they averaged between 45 to 75
dollars which means that my full bonus ranged from 100-150 dollars a
month. With the big deal he made about it I have to be honest, I had
expected more. Anyhow, the owners were out of the office a couple
weeks ago. Their daughter got the mail and she accidentally gave me
the bank statements for the other two employees. I found out tha the
sales guy has been receiving 1600 dollars and the shop guy has been
receiving 800 dollars for the monthly bonus. Me? 65 dollars! And that
was my whole bonus. I netted a whole 29 dollars. I AM HIGHLY PISSED
ABOUT THIS but there is nothing I can do. I cant ‘un-see’ what I saw
and every shitty bonus check I get is an insult. I havent even
deposited my last 29 dollar bonus check. Apparently he thinks my
contribution to the company is only worth 65 dollars. I can’t seem to
let go of this.

21 Comments to The Bogus Bonus

  1. He could keeping the money for himself report him to the department of labor. I know someone who’s former boss is being investigated by the FBI for something similar.

  2. Kate on February 21st, 2013
  3. Is this written down anywhere? If not, report him. Something is hinky, but be prepared to look for another job, especially if you live in a right-to-work state.

  4. Froggyalley on February 21st, 2013
  5. You are getting extra money every month. Someone else is getting more. Show more bewbs and you might find your bonus increases. A bonus is a bonus.

  6. The Oxford Comma on February 21st, 2013
  7. Look at it this way, it’s money that you wouldn’t get otherwise. And start looking for work elsewhere. Obviously, you’re not very important (at least to him), so you should go find meaningful work.

  8. Sir JP on February 21st, 2013
  9. Oh wow, that’s harsh. I would hate to receive extra money each month, no matter how much it was. Extra money sure is bad!

  10. stupid on February 21st, 2013
  11. I agree you are getting screwed. Your boss must be an idiot. I would look for another job and then call the boss on the carpet.

  12. Flip on February 21st, 2013
  13. this is why ill never EVER work for a hook nosed joo. they always screw you when it comes to money. they will even screw each other for it so hows that!

  14. Joachim on February 21st, 2013
  15. Story teller, you obviously aren’t earning as much as the other two. Perhaps if you worried more about your job and less about getting more than you are owed, you might find your paycheck growing. You kids these days want everything for free, you and the Muslims are ruining this country!

  16. Walternate the Costco Fareweller on February 21st, 2013
  17. My posts don’t seem to be appearing…

  18. Barbara on February 21st, 2013
  19. Perhaps you should seek other employment if you feel like your being undervalued in your pay.

  20. Airwing on February 21st, 2013
  21. Yea it sucks, BUT did you open the 2 other bank statement envelopes? If so this is reason enough that THEY can fire you.

  22. Moe Sizlek on February 21st, 2013
  23. Thank goodness for bank statements, huh OP? Ya know, this makes me think. A lot of people are harsh on the banking industry, but I’m quite fond banks. It’s a place where I can put money away and where I can get a loan. Putting money away, what a concept!

    Haha, that kind of reminds me of something. I have an ex-girlfriend who became really sick. Coughing all the time, phlem and all that stuff. She refused to go to the doctor. She just coughed up that stuff but instead of spitting it in a napkin, in the sink, toilet, or whatever, she would spit it all into a jar. I asked why and she said she planned to take it eventually to a doctor so they can figure out what’s wrong with her.

    Well, she was coughing it up at my house and spitting in a jar one evening as we got into a huge fight that led to an immediate break-up. She left in a hurry. Grabbed her gerbils, dildos, and jacket and left quickly. But she left jar. Well, about the same time, I was experience horribly dry skin due to the drought. Without lotion in the house, I decided to use a bit of her phlegm in the jar. It worked magically! Daily, I’d put that stuff on. It felt nice and was still warm even two days after she left!

    Now, I’ve run completely out and am working on my own collection as I’ve had a cold for the past week.

  24. Disgusting Dan on February 21st, 2013
  25. Ohhh Lord…. you just hit bottom Dan.

  26. Elvis Hitler on February 21st, 2013
  27. OP, you should be happy to have a job and to get paid what you’re getting along with the bonuses. I’m filing bankruptcy because I have no money and cannot get a legit job.

  28. Casey Anthony on February 21st, 2013
  29. It would be great if someone actually tried giving some advice to the poor lad.

  30. Elvis Hitler on February 21st, 2013
  31. Elvis, you can’t seriously think any of these stories are either real or from people wanting/expecting advice.

  32. Sir JP on February 21st, 2013
  33. Crawl under your bosses desk and get to work. That is how you earn a better bonus.

  34. Red Raider on February 21st, 2013
  35. if i had a boss, red raider, thats exactly what id do….give that fucker some glorious head….im hella good at it…. id make that asshole pay me his entire paycheck because hed be begging for more..

  36. someone on February 21st, 2013
  37. A few things to think about:

    What is the exact type of work you do? How much are you paid to do it? How long have you worked there? Are you a good employee – show up on time, do what you’re asked to do without griping, maybe even go above and beyond your job description once in awhile?

    What about the others? How long have they worked there? Are they good employees? Do you feel your boss plays favorites in other ways?

    Finally, do you deserve more money because you’ve earned it, or just because you want it? Whichever, the final solution may come down to: Is this the right job for you, or should you maybe look for something better?

  38. Caircair on February 22nd, 2013
  39. Dude an extra $1200/year, is an extra $1200 year.

    Don’t ask questions.

  40. t-rex on February 24th, 2013
  41. So… you receive money for doing your job…. Then… you receive more money…. for nothing…. then you are upset that someone else receives more of this free money? WTF is wrong with people.

  42. Mithos Riot on April 19th, 2013

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