My boss took me out for drinks last week. He kept my glass full and
before I knew it I was shitfaced. As if some college hazing ritual he
keep pressuring me to drink more, and I did against my better
judgment. Then he went to the bathroom and never came back. I waited
like 45 minutes. I was highly intoxicated, and I knew I shouldn’t
drive, but I figured I could walk home. So I leave the bar and there
is a shiny new bicycle leaned up against a post. In my drunken stupor
I think hey bicycle, I could get home a lot faster with these wheels.
I think I made it across the street when a cop stops me and tells me
that bike was reported stolen. It had literally only been a few
minutes. He made me do field sobriety tests because apparently you
don’t have to be driving a car to be charged with a DUI. Also
borrowing a bike can be misconstrued as theft. I called the boss to
bail me out and he came down and gave me a ride home, but we drove
around for HOURS while he lectured me on the evils of alcohol. WTF? A
few days later I got a notice that the theft charge had been dropped
as the “victim” didn’t want to press charges, but I had to fight the
DUI charge. So I was feeling at about the lowest point in my life and
I mentioned it to a co-worker. Apparently a similar thing happened to
another co-worker shortly after he started here, too. Eerily similar.
After comparing our stories, we concluded that the boss set us up. I
don’t know if he’s just an evil fucker or if he really hates alcohol
and uses this as a means to show people how bad alcohol is or what.
I’m not going out for drinks with a boss ever again.
Everything about this is just weird.
Although this is a very odd story, it has a good lesson. Don’t drink around your boss. I’ve seen so many people have a glass (or two or three) of wine at office parties, or work dinner functions and say or do something stupid.
Really? At what point did you think that it was OK to get shitfaced with your boss? Take personal responsibility. If you find it OK to go out with the boss after work, monitor yourself. Behave like a responsible adult. Of course I am calling BS on this story because it just sounds so… weird.
This story is as fake as a seven-dollar bill.
It does emphasize a point, though: don’t hang out with your boss. If you’re going to get drunk off your @$$ do it with people from outside of work.
So, you got drunk and stole a bicycle, and it’s your boss’ fault?
Not a fan of these fake stories.
By the way, here’s a useful piece of knowledge for you men: If it flies, floats or f*cks, lease it — don’t buy it.
That was good for a giggle. You learned a good lesson, and you still have a job. Consider that a win. Yeah, the DUI will suck. But, just think, you now know to not trust your boss to have your best interests in mind.
I think this story is BS, but in case it’s not…
If your boss kept your glass full, that means you kept trying to empty it.
dumb-ass.
And I went to university at a place where you’d always find an unlocked, beat up bike around 2:30 in the morning. because you were likely the 2nd or 3rd person that night to ride it.
So while I understand the appeal, at least my 20 year old self would have, walking out of a bar and snagging the nearest bike was just stoopid.
I think the story is fake, too, but it’s got some good points in it, like others said. Don’t drink on the clock. Don’t drink with your boss. Don’t trust anybody who keeps buying you drinks or who pressures you to drink more. Know your limit. If you DO drink alcohol and you don’t follow rules like these, you might be lacking in intelligence. Fake as a seven-dollar bill, yup, but has its merits.
There ARE some countries in which it’s extremely rude not to drink something given to you, but in all cases I know of, there’s also a known way to signal, “No more for me,” such as turning your cup upside-down.
Come on, guys. It was a SHINY new bicycle! I ALWAYS take the shiny new ones. Cut the poor guy a break!
you know what…i was kinda hoping this story turned out to be some chick who got too wasted and slept with the boss….that sounds kinda hot i guess….
I suppose there is also an easier solution: do not drink alcohol. Not the ‘right’ solution for everybody, but if one is an angry drunk, a mean drunk, or a stupid drunk, it might be the best solution.
Oxford: you’ve a valid point.
It was shiny! SHINY for godssake. How could they not?
Isn’t there some sort of small vermin that have an obsession with stealing SHINY objects?
for the sake of argument, i’ll assume this story is legit. there are a few lessons to be learned, which was largely named by posters above. never drink with coworkers or bosses. that holds especially true for the bosses. nothing good can come of it.
always know your limits when drinking. stay within your limits. never take something that’s not yours. being drunk was obviously no excuse.
also, whenever you choose to go out drinking, never let anyone pay for your drinks. buy your own. personally, i find it smarter to drink at home.
Oh, yes, and if you’re drinking in a club or a less-than-classy bar, you’re leaving bar for a minute, and you’ve got a drink there, ask the bartender to watch it, and/or put a coaster on top.
Here’s what this site has devolved to:
OP:”I told the boss and then instead of fixing the problem he fired me”
The first 35 commenters: “You shouldn’t have told your boss.”
Really? These comments are awash in astounding insight.
Ok, for once I agree with Flipcase. Why do so many people think that the correct response it to chastise the OP for something they know was wrong and that they admit was wrong. Seems kinda lazy to respond that way.
If you were drunk on malt liqor and went outside and started stealing i would know EXACTLY what race you are. black. i would press charges in that case 125 percent of the time. if you were just some white chick that made a drunk mistake i would let you go but you would be stupid to drink with that boss again.
Story teller sounds like a gay Nancy boy.
oh and also I was looking through old comments and i know that people say my spelling is bad and i know i don’t use puntuation right but im trying to say my opinion about something and if i try to spell everything right i cant really say what im thinking. just relize the good or bad or indifferent my opinions are always truthful and the way i see things but you dont need to think they are stupid because me and keyboards arent freinds.
My god. You all act like alcohol has never made you do anything stupid! Me, I’ve done a few things before when it involved drinking or going out or something related. But, I have NO REGRETS. BELLA VITA!
Hey, does anyone know where I can take some paralegal classes online at a respectible college?
Whoa. Holey moley. Walt, is your mouth burning today, or are you (as usual) pretending you think the slang you used means something wholesome and family-friendly? If it’s the former, I don’t agree with your statement, but I applaud you for growing some balls and saying something crazy, as opposed to the usual holier-than-thou BS where you call people whores.
Walter, lol.
Joachim, you are annoying because you are an annoying racist. This isn’t 1960, it’s not really acceptable or tolerated any more. You are an anchronism and the nail that sticks up is the one that gets pounded flat.
Gees, Walter. Why don’t you tell us how you really feel? What’s new in life Walter? How are things going with the devil woman and the other woman who has tempted you?
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. Nothing wrong with getting blasted.
But do it at home. That’s what I do.
Les Moore, it’s harder to meet sluts at home than it is at bars and clubs and what not.
I reckon Amy has not tempted me, as she is not a devil woman as that other Oriental. I believe Amy to be a true believer, pure and chaste and capable of bearing children. Mother had dropped hints that she may be willing to part with her engagement copy of Atlas Shrugged, if God leads me down the path to betrothal with Amy.
Joachim, it is not your spelling or grammar that bother me. Rather, it is the solid fact that you are an unabashed racist, sexist and homophobe, who does not seem to care that his stereotypes are often wrong. Come to my city and see all the Caucasian winos drinking their OE800. The white kids sagging and tagging. Were I to hear you sharing your opinions in my store, I would ban you without a moment’s hesitation. I ban customers who cannot leave their stupidity at the door or, at the very least, in their head, especially ones who have a stubbornness about their stupidity.
You like “Atlas Shrugged,” Walt? Seriously? Either you don’t know that Ayn Rand was a feminist and an atheist, or you don’t know your mom as well as you think you do.
Flip and Elvis – you’ve got a point.
But we’ve had a rash of op-showing-poor-judgement bad boss stories in the last few days. Today’s is a glaring example of it.
Guess we could all adopt the advice we received as kids, and not say anything if we’ve nothing nice to say, but… there’d be like… two comments, and they’d both say something akin to “sorry to hear about your experience”.
Walt – you crack me up.
Flipwing – Crows. Crows collect and horde shiny objects.
And gollums…
Stupid, if your objective is to get laid, then YOU shouldn’t be drinking. If you want to ply some ditzy wh*re with alcohol to get her to say yes, by all means I encourage it. But have the bartender bring *you* nonalcoholic drinks, because being drunk makes it a lot harder to get it up.
Les, why wouldn’t I drink? Drunk whores making drinking even more fun. And, drinking makes drunk whores more fun. It’s a win-win.
Zephyr, yeah Walter lost me with the Atlas Shrugged comment. Yep, Ayn Rand was certain an objectivist which is why she was an atheist. If you can’t prove God exists, then he doesn’t, so she believed. All in all, she was a hateful capitalist at best.
Yeah, Rand’s only connection to the Walt character is that she was kinda, or maybe really, crazy.
This is why I screw around with Walt, stupid. He’s a troll, and as troll philosophy runs, as soon as they’ve posted, they automatically win; any and every response as well as no response can be construed as a reaction. His schtick is the crazy right-wing fundie, but he throws in silly little anachronisms intended to make the reader go, “blah blah bl– wait, what!?” I figure if he’s going to be such an entertaining troll, I might as well respond and entertain myself, too.
Hey, maybe THAT’S where Walt got the million bucks he says he has (and says every hard worker should have) in his savings: he spent most of his 60+ years extracting tolls from people crossing his bridge!
Anyway, uh, where was I…? Ohh yeah. So, “Atlas Shrugged” is a good engagement gift, hmm? Tell me all about that, sir.
Patrick, yes OP in its drunken state looked at the bicycle and cried, “My Precioussss.” That is why the officer was so keen to pick up what was happening at the bar that night.
Ayn Rand believed in personal responsibility, each person is responsible for his or her own salvation. I am unaware of her religious stance, but if she was an atheist she is probably burning in Hell. Her stories contain important lessons, however, and should not be entirely discounted.
Walt: if your mom won’t part with her copy of Atlas Shrugged, perhaps she would be willing to part with her autographed photo of Eric Cantor instead. You might want to wash the lipstick off the picture frame.
Unless, of course, it’s YOUR lipstick…
I am laughing! I do not wear lipstick, Patricko, nor does Mother. No need for devil’s paint on our faces. I AM LAUGHING OUT LOUD!
but you do not refute the notion of puttin’ a little love on Cantor’s photo……
I find it interesting that many of the lists of lessons in this thread don’t include ‘don’t steal’.
Ahh, so she wrote good stories containing important lessons. That’s odd. Usually when there’s even the slightest shade of non-Christianity in something, you denounce the whole thing as satanic. Like, say, rock music, which is only a format – the content is up to the individual, who can use satanic junk or uplifting Christian messages as they see fit.
This is such a bizarre story. Your boss might be a borderline sociopath, OP. Be very careful when you put yourself into social situations from now on. Also, borrowing a bike without permission is stealing, even if you are being set up. You’re lucky the owner (likely, your sociopath boss) decided to drop the charges.
I reckon Ayn Rand’s stories are not incompatible with Christianity, Zephyr Skunk. They do not contain devil worship, black magic, or other such heathen nonsense. I believe her morals are very much in line with the teachings of Jesus.
She taught a whole lot of things that are VERY against your kinds of religious values. What about her ideas on sex? Here’s a nice quote: “She knew the general doctrine on sex, held by people in one form or another, the doctrine that sex was an ugly weakness of man’s lower nature, to be condoned regretfully. She experienced an emotion of chastity that made her shrink not from the desires of her body, but from any contact with the minds who held this doctrine.”
She taught that sex – not procreation per se, but sex and the pleasures of it – were one of the highest expressions of the glories of being human; that sex was something to be done for the enjoyment of it. And she made those ideas pretty clear in the book. Oh, and what about the characters who commit adultery, which is then NOT punished?
Adulterers and adultresses are punished in the afterlife, Zephyr Skunk, with an eternity burning in the fires of hell.
…except that there’s also the theme noted above, which is one of Rand’s big points: that sex is to be enjoyed. And, for that matter, that we should focus on the pleasures of life, and forget the notions of something better after this life. Another nice quote from the book: “Ask yourself whether the dream of heaven and greatness should be left waiting for us in our graves-or whether it should be ours here and now and on this earth.” The latter choice, the book makes crystal-clear, is in Rand’s opinion the correct one.
Walterbate is a gay nancy boy!
I am laughing! You are such a rascal, Urbanpossum!
Indeed, it’s pretty funny for anyone who claims to be such a good Christian, to worship Ayn Rand. Another case of people glossing over the reality, taking a very limited interpretation of the books, and completely ignoring her personal life and beliefs.
I do not worship false idols, Sir JP, but I do like her message of personal responsibility. It is a message we should all open our ears to as kids these days tend to want everything handed to them and do not wish to put in any work to get that which they want. You reap what you sow.
Here’s a much simpler Rand quote, Walt. “My philosophy, in essence, is the concept of man as a heroic being, with his own happiness as the moral purpose of his life, with productive achievement as his noblest activity, and reason as his only absolute.”
She’s stripped her entire philosophy, her ideas, down to one simple sentence, which rejects ideas that man’s purpose is to serve God, that man was born in and of sin and is worthless outside salvation, and that his only higher power should be the reaches of his own learning and understanding. That’s the backbone of her ideas of personal responsibility.
Feel free to say you like some of her ideas. But don’t claim “Atlas Shrugged” is more than an extremely long explanation of the above idea: that there is no higher power above us, nor should any hold us back from being our own individuals.
Atlas Shrugged had a decent story to it, what with industry failing when capitalism fails.
Atlas Shrugged was horribly written, she took her core idea and beat it repeatedly page after page.
It’s the kind of book that seems revolutionary or important when you’re in high school, but a few years later you realize it’s pretty much crap, and badly written at that.
I’d be interested in how Walter reconciles personal responsibility with a complete lack of marital fidelity or faithfulness, and a complete lack of any over riding morality other than selfishness. Because that’s her belief, a person’s personal pleasure is of the utmost importance.
I disagree. It isn’t horribly written. But she does indeed beat her core idea to death. You could remove about 800 pages and have a good story.
It seems all you commenters think about is physical relations. There is much more to life, and Ayn Rand, than that. I am sad for you and will pray that God lead you down the path to righteousness.
The cow said, “What I think about is moot to this conversation.”
I think what it boils down to as far as Walterbate goes is, “I am righteous in everything O do, think, believe, and say. If I say something corrupt has high moral value, it’s true. If I say something of high moral value is corrupt, it’s true. I am God’s mouth and hand on earth, and don’t you forget it!”
Wouldn’t it be great, Walt, if you could just say the word and everybody would live their lives the way you think they should?
…actually, no, that would suck. Because that’d take away those personal freedoms Rand was so big on.